DailySmoke

Kotek's location was kept secret for her safety, according to staff, as Kotek faces widespread public ire. Other solutions were available to the ODOT shortfalls, which could have avoided tax hikes. Both the solutions and the feedback were ignored by the governor.

Eyewitnesses say the unlikely duo stormed the main stage, their identical haircuts shimmering under the conference lights like two carbon-neutral helmets of destiny.

So now, while families wonder how to cover rent or buy groceries, and counties lose key funds, I’ll stay focused on telling you nothing will turn out fine and I'll make sure your roads are sheets of ice ... unless you let me tax you to death. Then everything will be great.